That is Enough, By: Anonymous

Photo By: Sujin Jetkasettakorn

I wonder if there will be a day

That I can smile and really be okay?

I wonder if everyone will know just by looking at me

That I am broken and I am not at all free?

To those who know they call me strong, and

I cannot bring myself to tell them they are all wrong.

To those who do not know or who can’t understand,

The pain I have endured has left without a sensible plan.

I have changed.

My eyes no longer gleam in the sunlight, 

My thoughts are always haunting me during the night.

The guilt is always there that I am to blame

For their behavior, lies, and games.

I have endured verbal beatings because I refuse to

Fight a fight in which everyone will lose.

I will not defend myself in a web of lies,

Nor will I fight to tell my side.

It’s over now

Or so they say, but my mind refuses to let me play.

Instead I am kept in torment

Of the past I cannot forget.

The damage that was done to my insides

Will not just die.

I have a good life…a family, two wonderful kids, a house and a great job;

Some would say I have it all.

But inside me lives a pain

That is so deep and runs through my veins.

It keeps me from being the girl I want to be,

The woman I seek to find inside of me.

When is it really over?

Perhaps a question I cannot answer,

But I live each day with the intent of being okay…

And for now, that is enough to get me through each day.

Untitled By:Author Unknown

You know, one of the main reasons I started this blog and grass roots movement is because it is such a taboo subject for people to talk about.  Choosing a cause to support is a deeply personal issue and, of course, I have my reasons.  There is also a reason why I call this blog The "Compassion" Fashion Project.  Compassion is just not common enough and sometimes when you need your friends the most they bail on you, because what you are going through makes them feel uncomfortable.  BUT, what you have to remember is that no matter how uncomfortable it is for YOU, it is ten times worse for her.

She cannot change what she is feeling for you.  Recovering from a violent relationship is a process and one of the most confusing things one can go through.  Being there for her as a friend is the best thing you can do.  Will she go back?  Maybe she will, maybe she won't, but you have to give her the respect she deserves to make her own decisions and go through whatever emotions she needs to feel on her own time.  I'm not a domestic violence expert and I do not claim to be, but one thing I know for sure is that I'm a true friend.

~Meredith Cavaness Corning

"Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather is one of those things that give value to survival."
- C. S. Lewis

I Wanted To Float, By: Elizabeth Newell

The second poem in a series by Elizabeth Newell.  Recovering from domestic violence is often a disturbing process and this series of poems is meant to give a deeper understanding of this and why as a community it is vital for us to show patience and understanding to the victims.

Written: Saturday, March 22, 2008

           

i wanted to float

 

i moved the corner.

 

the sun left.

 

cant breathe, trying to be numb, but theres still feeling.

 

friends are distrusting & i cant see them anyway.

 

someone sang & i was put in a cage.

 

lifes a bitter taste when it comes back up.

 

who left me? did i deserve it? were they even here?

 

i have no savior. i have no husband. i have no back bone.

 

i miss my chair. where i sat in his lap. he held me when i cried, cause i missed my chance.

 

hes gone. and i left him. i had to. my skin begged me for freedom.

 

now pale & no longer bruised. we are alone. missing the pain & punches.

 

accustomed to being dirt. i look for the lowest points i can find. swell & squirm, until i almost suffucate.

 

life is laughing at me. time has became a disillusion.

 

surrounding myself with people who dont matter or love me. looking for a home when the drifting tires me.

 

i am death. still breathing.

 

and he's missed as i inhale.

 

i am not. no one misses me.

 

here for my daughter. if it wasn't for her.. i would of been in the water.

 

pulled from the bridge and saved by the one person i was told i should beware. he's the only male friend that has been true to me. sir thomas brought me through.

floating was a nice idea.

however she would of missed me.

i will never make her feel like this.