That is Enough, By: Anonymous

Photo By: Sujin Jetkasettakorn

I wonder if there will be a day

That I can smile and really be okay?

I wonder if everyone will know just by looking at me

That I am broken and I am not at all free?

To those who know they call me strong, and

I cannot bring myself to tell them they are all wrong.

To those who do not know or who can’t understand,

The pain I have endured has left without a sensible plan.

I have changed.

My eyes no longer gleam in the sunlight, 

My thoughts are always haunting me during the night.

The guilt is always there that I am to blame

For their behavior, lies, and games.

I have endured verbal beatings because I refuse to

Fight a fight in which everyone will lose.

I will not defend myself in a web of lies,

Nor will I fight to tell my side.

It’s over now

Or so they say, but my mind refuses to let me play.

Instead I am kept in torment

Of the past I cannot forget.

The damage that was done to my insides

Will not just die.

I have a good life…a family, two wonderful kids, a house and a great job;

Some would say I have it all.

But inside me lives a pain

That is so deep and runs through my veins.

It keeps me from being the girl I want to be,

The woman I seek to find inside of me.

When is it really over?

Perhaps a question I cannot answer,

But I live each day with the intent of being okay…

And for now, that is enough to get me through each day.